ramblin

this morning i woke up to a new number. that was awesome. i'm now 214. that's awesome. not sure if that was because i got a fill or because i was on liquids all day but either way i'm pleased with it.

i can't figure out how to make my font not look like this. so bear with me. sigh!

here are some thoughts i've been having....

lots of us banders never exercised before the band. we didn't feel motivated or didn't want to or whatever. everyone has their own reasons. now we got the band. now we suddenly want to exercise and feel motivated. is that because we had the band put it in? i mean, did it bring with it some kinda "make ya wanna exercise" hormones or something? i just don't quite get how a person goes from never exercising to exercising on a regular basis simply becuase they got the band. couldn't they have chosen to do the exercise even without the band? of course they/we could've. so why didn't we???

eating. why is it that even when i'm not feeling hungry, i have a hard time not eating stuff? i mean, i think i only feel hungry three times a day. morning lunch and night. althought today i did get hungry around 4pm (between lunch and dinner) but that's not normal. so why is it that i find myself snacking? is it habit? how do i break it? i find myself bored and wanna eat. watching tv and wanna eat. what's up with that???

also, i ate twice as much as i shoulda tonight. i was full after one serving but i got another. why? becuase it tasted good. why did i do that? 

skinny chicks. i have this friend who is super skinny. somehow she thinks she needs to lose weight. obviously she is deluded... but anyway.... actually i have two skinny ass friends who feel that way. what is wrong with them??? and why would they say that kinda stuff to someone who is obviously not even near skinny? that's just jacked up. 

onederland. i wanna be there so bad. it'll be here soon. i can feel it. 15 pounds to go!!! i was thinking earlier that when i hit it i won't get to celebrate like i really want to. i can tell my friend who is a fellow bandster, a friend who isn't one, and my sister. and ya'll. that's all i can do. i can't go celebrate cuz my husband is living in this fantasyland where i weigh less than he does (he weighs like 189) and i have no desire to bring him back to reality about it. i mean, if he wants to think like that. so be it? who am i to dash his ideas that i'm smaller than him? at first i thought surely he can't really believe that but i've come to realize he really does. it kinda bothers me to a point cuz i'm like "is he blind or what?" but at the same time i'm just like "ok.... you think that then." lol


target. today i realized that target kinda sucks. i went in there and tried on some shirts. they were size xxl. they didn't fit. too tight. yet i was wearing a similar shirt from old navy and it was only an xl and was not only fitting but kinda loose. what's up with that? i think target's stuff must be sized small. at the same time i love me some gillian o'malley and their workout wear. and they have cute stuff for kids, too.


ok...i guess i'm done.